I have always suffered from anxiety, depression and obsessive compulsive disorder since I was a child. What triggered my anorexia was a combination of things.
I was going through puberty at nine years old, which was very early then, and I was the only one - because of that I was bigger than the others. I was bullied because I was different - I was into rock music and playing my guitar.
When it developed into anorexia, it was after someone told me I should go on a diet - at the time I was 14 and it is very young to be thinking about those things. It was then that my obsession with exercise started.I was walking the streets from 6am in the morning to 6pm at night, or going up and down any stairs I could find. I really don’t know how I did it, I shouldn’t have been able to walk that far. It was the anorexic adrenaline.
I remember being transferred to an eating disorders unit and they didn’t think I would make it through the night. My mum was so worried about me but until I accepted I had a problem there was nothing anyone else could do.
It got out of control. It wasn’t about wanting to be thin, it was about wanting to disappear.
I got to the point when I thought, ‘This isn’t getting me anywhere’. I was really miserable and I had no time left in my day because of my obsessions.
I am a young woman and I was missing out on so much. I thought, ‘I’m living the same sad life in hospital as I was outside. Life can’t be any worse - why don’t I just give it (recovery) a go?’
It annoys me that these magazines complain about size zero celebrities then the next minute they go on about slimming down for summer. It sends out a mixed message.
I still have problems but I am enjoying life now. I want to give others hope that they can get over anorexia and rebuild their lives.
(Source: Daily Mail)